Alibi

Maybe some of you noticed my lack in proper entries these days. Maybe some of you don't even give two hoots about it at all. Oh well...

Truth is, being a sneeze away from a chock-full PC with great stuffs and a hiccup away from a braodband internet connection paid a great deal. I lost the much-needed 'urgency'.

Back in Bote, there was practically nothing to do in the dorm compound other than sports (which in domestic definition actuality; football) or a frequent foray to Downtown (a male equivalent to the female cafe stylishly dubbed as Uptown) for a momentary distraction from the burgeoning study workload. So ever since I started blogging, I can be at peace with almost anything rather than driving myself up the wall in response to the boredomness induced in campus. And the fact that the campus doesn't offer in-room internet connection or any of the likes of it fueled my passion for blogging in an odd manner.

I was basically writing entries on a daily basis. It almost became religious. Flooding readers with multiple entries at a time is a common scenario. After all, blogging made a profound impact on my written and spoken language studies (English. Heh). Ever the more reason for me to keep on keeping on right? That's what I thought.

Blogging needs only 3 things actually. Your computer, you and your conscious. So after a while I got tired of staring at a blank, white screen with the blinking text marker waiting for me to hit the right keys that spells, "So today was o.k.". Deja vu is ineveitable. Redundancy is evil.

As much as I claim that this 3 months break is all about 'nothingness' thus far, I realize now that 'nothing is everything'. Less is more. I have been doing lots of stuff other than downloading music off Soulseek and deliberately sleeping at 4 in the morning to wake up approximately 6 hours later circa 10:30 a.m. But this entry is not about re-living those unspoken moments. It's about the lackness of me.

If I were to be in anyone's shoes and reading this, I would say,"He's written this long and still bitching about being 'lack'?". Yes, I am still bitching about it but I've manage to get this far thanks to these 3 things. Me, a pen and a paper. Yes, doing it old school. Literature at its purest form. Handwritten.

Jotting down your thoughts without having your fingers tapping on a modern, plastic piece of technology is better than driving to work without the bumper-to-bumper traffic nightmare. Your own handwriting, no matter how ugly it is (mine's beyond 'ugly'), is inspirational to you by its own right.

I may keep on doing this. It's been the longest of time since I wrote something akin to this on a piece of paper. At least untill I get tired of doing it this way or suddenly I'm demented enough to be halucinating a naked redhead 'flashing' the text marker on the monitor. Nonetheless, I hope this is a fresh re-start.

For now, I'll download more music and will sleep at 4 a.m. See you after lunch.